Not feeling like I belong anywhere

My father is a soldier.

If your father is a soldier in Türkiye, it means you move to another city every 3 or 4 years until you get separated from your family.

So was my life.

Until I started university, we had lived in 6 cities in Turkey due to assignments of my father. There are plus 3 more cities I lived in due to different reasons, so at total I had lived in 9 different cities for my whole life. Oh, I didn't count Japan and Estonia by the way.

There are both pros and cons of this situation.



I'm 28 years old right now. I can say I do not feel like I belong to anywhere and I do not have any friend in a strong, real meaning. I have always envied people who have close friendships I saw around me, in the movies and the books, also the people who have grown up in a one place and formed a bond with a city.

Yet I can't know how I would feel if had a life otherwise. I might have found those life styles very boring. Who knows. After all, we are always looking for what we do not have.

I'm glad I had a computer, books and curious personality for my whole childhood. Although I felt lonely sometimes, most of the time I had been always busy with my computer, books, tinkering activities and discovering the nearest natural place.

I'm, again, glad everything turned out this way. Because ​I have learned to spend time with myself and have a peaceful relationship with my inner mind which I believe it is one of the most important skills in this modern era.

Right now I'm at my Estonia part of my life and I've no idea what awaits me in the future.

I'm trying to learn not to worry about worries I have no power over and to enjoy what I have at the moment.